Dan Savage Makes Nonmonogamy Sound So Darn Sensible

Friday, 1 July 2011

doves.jpg (591×394)
Jessica, I have had a platonic crush on Dan Savage for many many years, dating back to the earlier days of the Internet when he supplemented his Stranger column with (much tamer) online chats with his on ABCNews.com.  So he could probably talk me into just about anything. And so I, too, was greatly interested in what he had to say in Mark Oppenheimer's NYT Magazine Piece.
Oppenheimer’s piece is indeed wonderful, and I agree that Savage’s attitude is sensible in theory but far more complicated in practice.  The average spouse—man or woman—who, when confronted with charges of adultery, would not do well to wave Oppenheimer’s article and say, “But see, Dan Savage thinks it’s OK.”
You conclude that in “civilian relationships,” as compared to political marriages, you’re not sure it’s worth talking about a nonmonogamous arrangement. I agree it probably wouldn’t work for most couples—and I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t be down with it, but I still think Savage has a point.
For me, the most telling quote comes near the end: “The greater good is the home created for children,” Savage writes. “If there are children present, they’ll get past it. The cultural expectation should be if there’s infidelity, the marriage is more important than fidelity.”
Having children shouldn’t give anyone the right to cheat just because staying together for the kids is more important—Savage stresses repeatedly that the time to talk about “nonmonagmy” is before either partner in a relationship has a fling.
But whenever I find out that a friend or acquaintance with children is getting divorced, I can’t help but imagine myself in their situation and picture what it would be like, to see my kids only half the time, to have to split up Christmases and birthdays, to spend time worrying about pickups and drop-offs that should be spent on lazy Sunday mornings with pancakes and cartoons.  Even if you’re the victim in the situation, you pay a pretty high price when you end a marriage.
In another segment, Oppenheimer writes that “I don’t mind if my wife tells me another man is hot, but it took me a long time to accept her criticism of my writing.” There is so much to a marriage besides sex, and even besides children. We expect our partners to support our careers, share our interests, and at least tolerate our friends and family.  If sex is put alongside those other expectations, rather than looming large over everything, it’s possible to take a Savage-like approach to fidelity.
READ MORE - Dan Savage Makes Nonmonogamy Sound So Darn Sensible

Stunning Change of Fortune for Former Chief of the International Monetary Fund


Dominique-Strauss-Kahn-007.jpg (460×276)                                                     New York
 (Tadias) – In a stunning turn of events, the sexual assault case against Dominique Strauss-Kahn, the former chief of the International Monetary Fund, is near collapse, as police said they have discovered lies and inconsistencies in his accuser’s story and possible links to criminal activities, media reports say.
According to The New York Times: “Although forensic tests found unambiguous evidence of a sexual encounter between Mr. Strauss-Kahn, a French politician, and the woman, prosecutors now do not believe much of what the accuser has told them about the circumstances or about herself.”
The paper said prosecutors met with Strauss-Kahn’s lawyers on Thursday and the parties discussed whether to dismiss the felony charges against him.
Sources told the New York Times that the prosecutors had discovered issues involving the asylum application of the hotel employee – a 32-year-old Guinean woman – and other illegal activities including drug dealing and money laundering.
“The woman had a phone conversation with an incarcerated man within a day of her encounter with Mr. Strauss-Kahn in which she discussed the possible benefits of pursuing the charges against him…the conversation was recorded,” NYT reports quoting law enforcement officials. “That man, the investigators learned, had been arrested on charges of possessing 400 pounds of marijuana. He is among a number of individuals who made multiple cash deposits, totaling around $100,000, into the woman’s bank account over the last two years. The deposits were made in Arizona, Georgia, New York and Pennsylvania.”
“It is a mess, a mess on both sides,” another official told the paper.
“The investigators also learned that she was paying hundreds of dollars every month in phone charges to five companies. The woman had insisted she had only one phone and said she knew nothing about the deposits except that they were made by a man she described as her fiancé and his friends,” NYT said.
“Indeed, Mr. Strauss-Kahn could be released on his own recognizance, and freed from house arrest, reflecting the likelihood that the serious criminal charges against him will not be sustained,” the paper said. “The district attorney’s office may try to require Mr. Strauss-Kahn to plead guilty to a misdemeanor, but his lawyers are likely to contest such a move.”
Strauss-Kahn resigned from his post at the IMF within days of his arrest back in May.
READ MORE - Stunning Change of Fortune for Former Chief of the International Monetary Fund

Page One: Inside the New York Times


page_one_inside_the_new_york_times_wallpaper.jpg (450×264)
Where do you get your news?  Hopefully azfamily.com and 3TV are at the top of your list.  It’s a question I would have no trouble answering with a plethora of sources…unlike a stammering candidate I don’t even need to name.
Everyone can agree that the days of getting breaking news by way of your local newspaper are long gone.  The irony of seeing a preview for “Page One:  Inside the New York Times” on the very day that The Arizona Republic had significant layoffs was not lost on this audience member.  Newspapers, like TV news, are fighting for their lives with every issue and every newscast.  How newspapers and more precisely, how the venerable New York Times will survive is central to the documentary that takes you inside the daily grind of putting out ‘the beast’.
When I first got the invite to see “Page One:  Inside the NYT” I did not hesitate for one minute to make my reservation.  I will always remember the first time I saw an issue. It was a revelation on what a big city newspaper had to offer.  Now, here was a chance to go inside a highly respected institution and see how it ticked.  I was not disappointed.  The documentary gives a brief overview of the paper’s history but concentrates on the issue of how a business built on dead trees will survive in a paperless world.
We meet some of the players but only one emerges as a total superstar:  journalist David Carr.  His NYT bio lists his various positions at numerous papers over the years.  Currently, Carr is a columnist for the Monday Business section.  While his primary focus is media issues, including print, digital, film, radio and television, he also covers pop culture. 
But I think he secretly wears a cape on the side and most definitely bleeds ink!  There’s no question Carr’s not only fighting for his livelihood but for a business he loves dearly and believes with all his heart and soul are worth fighting for.  After seeing “Page One:  Inside the NYT”, I want to fight with him.  He is feisty, fearless, tenacious and amazingly quick witted for a guy who comes across as having lost more than a few brain cells in his self-confessed drugged out past.
While Carr’s passion is palpable, it is a healthy respect for the work of true journalism that one walks away with after seeing “Page One:  Inside the NYT”.  While bloggers everywhere might be quick to spread the word online and with Twitter and Face book, it’s boots on the ground that get the real work of digging, fact finding and most importantly attribution done.  It’s a job best left to the professionals as Carr is quick to point out to hipsters at Vice Magazine and the rep from aggregate site newser.  Watching Carr rip into the guys from Vice was hilariously salty!  But embracing these cyber upstarts could be the very key to prints survival as is illustrated by a recent successful collaboration with WikiLeaks.  The intrigue behind the scenes of that joint venture was fascinating and fun to watch unfold.
Breaking news on dead trees might be uncool but the real work of investigative journalism will be what saves papers like the New York Times and our own Arizona Republic.  And in corrupt times like these, we need these bold journalists and their well worn boots more than ever.  Bravo Ladies and Gentlemen.  Bravo!
READ MORE - Page One: Inside the New York Times

UPDATE 2-New York seeks to lift fracking moratorium-NYT


* Governor's office calls report "baseless"
* Moratorium due to expire on Friday
(Adds details, background)
NEW YORK, June 30 (Reuters) - New York state Governor
Andrew Cuomo is expected to lift a moratorium on the
controversial natural gas extraction technique known as
hydraulic fracturing, The New York Times reported on Thursday.
Such a move could open the state to a gas drilling boom
similar to what is happening in neighboring Pennsylvania, and
it would certainly raise opposition from environmentalists who
believe "fracking" or "hydrofracking" pollutes drinking water.
A spokesman for Governor Andrew Cuomo, Joshua Vlasto,
called the report "baseless speculation and premature."
In a nod to fracking opponents, state officials were
considering maintaining ban in sensitive areas such as the
massive watershed in upstate New York that provides drinking
water to millions of people in New York City, the Times said,
citing people briefed on the plan.
A moratorium imposed by former Governor David Paterson was
due to expire on Friday.
In June the Democratic-led state Assembly voted to extend
the moratorium for another year, but the Republican-led Senate
never passed the measure, leaving in place the July 1 deadline
for the state's Department of Environmental Conservation (DEC)
to issue a report on the examining the impacts of fracking.
DEC officials declined to discuss the report on Thursday.
It was expected to contain recommendations for the governor.
Environmental concerns have slowed a natural gas drilling
boom in shale formations such as the Marcellus Shale that lies
beneath much of Pennsylvania and several surrounding states
including New York. [ID:nN18229665]
The process involves blasting millions of gallons of water,
sand and chemicals into rock to release the gas trapped inside.
Critics say leaks of the chemicals at the surface endanger
groundwater and that escaped gas and drilling operations
pollute the air.
Industry officials say opponents have exaggerated the
environmental impact, while economic benefits to the state
would be significant. New York is home to a large piece of the
Marcellus Shale, a massive formation believed to be one of the
richest natural gas deposits on the planet.
READ MORE - UPDATE 2-New York seeks to lift fracking moratorium-NYT

Geithner Staying (for Now)

73.jpg (240×160)
WASHINGTON —Treasury Secretary Timothy F. Geithner said Thursday that he planned to stay in his job “for the foreseeable future.”

Normally, that would not qualify as news. But Mr. Geithner’s comments came in a frenzied afternoon of speculation after news reports that he was considering leaving the Obama administration in the coming months, after a deal is reached with Congress to reduce the budget deficit.
Mr. Geithner’s comments, made at a conference in Chicago organized by former President Bill Clinton, were clearly intended to douse that speculation, underscoring how worried the White House is about the potentially destabilizing effect of his departure as it struggles with a fragile recovery and holds tough negotiations with Congress to avert a debt crisis.
“I live for this work, it’s the only work I’ve done, and I believe in it,” Mr. Geithner said in reply to a question from Mr. Clinton about his career plans. “I’m going to be doing it for the foreseeable future.”
Mr. Geithner, who turns 50 in August, said his son had decided to attend his final year of high school in New York, where Mr. Geithner previously lived, which meant that he would be commuting between Washington and New York for a while.
Earlier in the day, two administration officials familiar with Mr. Geithner’s thinking said family issues were weighing on him, as well as the recognition that there was a window of opportunity for him to leave after a debt deal was reached, but before the election year of 2012.
If Mr. Geithner does depart, he would be the last member of Mr. Obama’s economic brain trust to leave after two-and-a-half years of turmoil. In that time, the White House confronted a financial crisis, a historic recession, near double-digit unemployment and a recovery that has yet to gain traction.
Austan Goolsbee, one of Mr. Obama’s chief economic advisers, recently announced he would return to his teaching post at the University of Chicago. Lawrence H. Summers, a former Treasury secretary in the Clinton administration and a major Obama adviser, left late last year for Harvard, while Christina Romer, Mr. Obama’s first head of the Council of Economic Advisers, returned last summer to the University of California, Berkeley.
Of all these departures, Mr. Geithner’s would arguably have the greatest impact. He has become one of the president’s closest and most trusted counselors, attending his daily briefings and coordinating the White House’s strategy on crucial issues like financial reform and pressuring China on its currency.
Mr. Geithner’s influence within the administration has grown as other senior advisers have left, including some with whom he had clashed. He is perhaps now at the peak of his power, urging along the president’s gradual embrace of deficit reduction and heading the administration’s focus on foreign trade as an opportunity to accelerate growth at home.
Equally important is the credibility he enjoys on Wall Street, where he worked as president of the Federal Reserve Bank of New York before joining the Obama administration. Mr. Geithner is seen as deeply knowledgeable about the intricacies of modern finance and protective of the system’s health.
As Congress dallies over whether to raise the debt ceiling, Mr. Geithner’s repeated and forceful assurances that Washington understands the ceiling must be raised, and his unequivocal commitment that it will indeed be raised, have helped to preserve calm among investors.
Finding a replacement for him, and winning Senate confirmation would not be easy. Among potential candidates are Erskine Bowles, former chief of staff to Mr. Clinton and co-chairman of President Obama’s deficit commission; Roger Altman, an investment banker and former deputy Treasury secretary in the Clinton years; Janet Yellen, the vice chairwoman of the Federal Reserve; and Gene Sperling, director of the National Economic Council, who previously served as a lieutenant to Mr. Geithner.
But any of those candidates would most likely face a contentious confirmation hearing in the Senate as the country heads into a presidential election year and especially so if the economy remains sluggish. 
For all these reasons, reports that Mr. Geithner was leaving captured the attention of Washington and financial markets.
The drama began in midafternoon when Bloomberg News reported that Mr. Geithner was weighing his departure, citing three unidentified people familiar with his thinking. The White House and Treasury declined to comment on the report, but The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, and other media organizations soon confirmed the gist of it and posted their own versions.
Officials cautioned that Mr. Geithner had made no decision, and directed reporters to listen to a discussion he was scheduled to have with Mr. Clinton in Chicago, where he would address his plans.
Seated on a dais across from Mr. Clinton, Mr. Geithner argued that a deal to reduce the deficit was crucial to demonstrate, at home and abroad, that the United States could put its fiscal house in order.
“If we can lock in some long-term reforms, then we’ll have a chance to turn our attention to the many other challenges facing our country,” Mr. Geithner said. He predicted that the American economy could return to the brisk growth it enjoyed during the 1990s.
“We’re just living with the scars, damage from the worst crisis since the great depression,” he said.
Their discussion wound to a close, and Mr. Clinton declared he would ask one “press question” — namely, was Mr. Geithner planning to leave? He smiled, offered his demurral, and the panel ended — and with it, it would seem, his hope of returning to New York any time soon.
READ MORE - Geithner Staying (for Now)

Movie Review: Life and times of the New York Times


The haughty reputation of the New York Times has taken several hits during the past decade, from Jayson Blair and Judith Miller to newsroom layoffs and dubious partnerships with folks like Julian Assange. But nothing undermined the Gray Lady quite like a 2009 article in The Atlantic declaring that the end of Times was near.
Was it really possible that the nation’s “paper of record” was about to become journalism’s Lehman Bros., gone in the blink of an eye? It sure seemed that way when its financial worth plummeted so far and so fast that a share of Times stock dipped lower than the price of its Sunday paper. But reports of the Lady’s death were greatly exaggerated.
It’s not the newspaper it used to be, but it’s still a thriving entity, as suggested in “Page One: Inside the New York Times.” For nearly a year, filmmakers Andrew Rossi and Kate Novack became what Rossi calls the proverbial “fly on the wall” at the paper’s Midtown Manhattan headquarters, gaining access to not just the newsroom, but also departing Executive Editor Bill Keller and the roundtable meetings at which the top editors pitch and debate what stories they think belong on “A1.”
Sounds fascinating, doesn’t it? That’s what I thought, too, until I was about 20 minutes into this scattershot attempt to explain the challenges of spreading the news in these technologically turbulent times. So, instead of nonstop insights into the politics and inner-workings of the Times, we get a parade of plugs for blogger websites and a big kiss-up to Steve Jobs and the miracle of the iPad, which “Page One” all but declares to be the savior of the floundering newspaper industry.
The filmmakers seem oddly uninformed about the business of newspapers. Maybe that’s why they dart distractingly from one topic to the next.
Luckily, there’s David Carr, the Times’ freewheeling media columnist, who seems to have modeled his life after Hunter S. Thompson, complete with a drugged-out past and a curmudgeonly personality. Carr is a blast, tenacious in both his reporting skills and in his defense of the Times. The scene where he verbally assaults one of the newspaper’s founders is too sublime for words.
Apparently, the filmmakers also loved Carr’s contributions. The second half of the movie spends more time on the colorful columnist than it does on issues such as how newspapers can compete with Twitter, WikiLeaks, ProPublica and countless other distractions. In some ways, that’s a smart decision, considering how dry “Page One” would be without Carr. But it also underscores the film’s inability to focus on the subject at hand.
The film’s ADD is a bit ironic; that’s one of the problems newspapers face with their readers. At one point, “Page One” even jumps to some out-of-leftfield reminiscing about Daniel Ellsberg and Watergate, a few digs at Judith Miller and her unsubstantiated reports of WMDs in Iraq, and a lot of blathering by outsiders like Gay Talese and former TV Guide writer Jeff Jarvis who know nothing about how the Times operates. Inconsequential archival footage, several repetitive clips of Carr debating the role of newspapers at media conferences, and a trip back to Carr’s hometown of Minneapolis do nothing to inform viewers who were expecting an insider’s view of the Times.
Who knew newspaper people were so boring? At least that’s the way they come across in “Page One.” It’s interesting when Tim Arango decides to leave the newspaper’s media department so he can transfer to the Baghdad bureau. But, do we go along with him to see him assimilate from a comfortable job to the rigors of a Baghdad assignment? Of course not. It’s just one more moment when “Page One” misses the story.

READ MORE - Movie Review: Life and times of the New York Times

New Questions Raised in DSK Case as Maid's Credibility Brought into Question


OB-OO116_dsk063_DV_20110630230800.jpg (262×394)
The case against Dominique Strauss-Kahn is on unsteady ground, as investigators have found significant holes in the credibility of the housekeeper who accused the French diplomat of sexual assault in May, sources familiar with the case tell NBC New York.
As a result of the credibility problems, defense lawyers plan to ask for Strauss-Kahn's bail to be reduced, requesting that he be released on his own recognizance. He is set to appear in court Friday.
Prosecutors are considering agreeing to reduced bail conditions, but the Manhattan District Attorney's office is not ready to dismiss charges, a source said. The hearing Friday is expected just to deal with bail issues; what to do about the charges overall will be dealt with going forward.
The accusations against Strauss-Kahn have reverberated internationally since the alleged incident; he was once a likely top French presidential contender, and has since resigned his post as head if the International Monetary Fund.
One source tells NBC New York that the maid, who is Guinean, was dishonest about a past claim of rape and “lied extensively" an on application for asylum.
While recounting her previous rape story to those prosecutors, the maid did so quite believably, the source said. "She was crying and very emotional during that telling of what she said had happened."
When prosecutors again questioned the woman, she admitted "she lied to them, and on the application about the whole rape claim," the source said.
Though this claim isn't directly related to her allegations against Strauss-Kahn, the woman's lack of truthfulness puts a significant dent in her credibility, and, by proxy, the case against Strauss-Kahn.
Questions are also being raised about whether the woman had been truthful about her background with law enforcement authorities, the source said. Another source says she may have links to possible criminal suspects.
The New York Times reports that the maid spoke by phone on a recorded call with an incarcerated man on the day of the alleged assault, and discussed the possible benefits of pursuing charges.
The man was serving time for drug possession, and was one of several people who had made numerous cash deposits to the maid's bank accounts in several states, the Times said.
Her lawyer, Ken Thompson, did not return repeated calls seeking comment. NYPD spokesman Paul Browne and the Manhattan DA's spokeswoman Erin Duggan would not comment.
The Manhattan District Attorney's office said Strauss-Kahn will appear Friday at 11:30 a.m., but refused to give details.
Strauss-Khan remains on home confinement in a $50,000-a-month Tribeca townhouse. He denies charges he attempted to rape the maid in his suite at the Sofitel Hotel in May.
Defense lawyers have said there was no "forcible" encounter. DNA evidence found on the maid's shirt did match a sample from Strauss-Kahn.
The terms of his house arrest, since his release from Rikers Island on May 20, allow him to leave the residence for one weekly religious observance, medical appointments, meetings with lawyers and court appearances.
Prosecutors must be notified at least six hours before he goes anywhere. He also must wear an electronic monitoring device and live under video surveillance.
READ MORE - New Questions Raised in DSK Case as Maid's Credibility Brought into Question